I have joined the ranks
of fugitives, flightless birds, abandoned relations,
and orphaned diaspora.
at last, I have been thrown into adulthood
to live this grief by pretending that it doesn't exist,
by repeting
that most of us live like this.
no scholar can calculate
the distance between us
or the precise amount of time
it takes to cross it.
my life without you is a contorted animal carcass
on the road to nowhere.
you have set me free
like a hound into the empty field
with no aim.
I want to be a funeral director
so I can relive this death again and again.
I want know if it ever ends.
